Nothing is worse than being hurt by someone you love. The very people that you put your trust into, but it happens, even in the places you least expect…The Church.
Everyone has high expectations for the church. They expect the pastor and his family to be the ultimate example as if he is Jesus himself in flesh. You wouldn’t expect there to be gossip, unfairness and manipulation in the church.
I’ve been around the block a few times when it comes to church hurts, and I can say it’s like a knife going straight into your heart. Just like dealing with family pain, church pain is also very difficult.
Many times we don’t want to express the hurt we have faced to keep the visage that the church is perfect. Others couldn’t face it any more and have not only left the church but left God.
For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard. – Romans 2:23
The first thing we need to remember, the church is filled with people like me and you…and we are not perfect. We all have a sinful nature and sometimes we want things our way without realizing we are hurting people. Even the greatest leaders in the bible sinned.
Express how you feel to others.
The first thing we tend to do when we are hurt is build up walls. We don’t want anyone to know the real hurt we feel. I find this is especially true for women because we are always trying to protect our children and family, that we don’t want to show our vulnerability.
God is not asking us to carry these burdens alone.
Everything we go through builds character
God has a plan in every aspect of our lives. He knows what you are going through. There is a bigger plan in all of this. Trust God that He will see you through it.
Talk to God
Bring everything to God in prayer. Jesus has experienced this as well. He was rejected by the Pharisees and Sadducees. His own people rejected him. These things had to hurt him as well.
Be faithful to God
One of the main reasons we get hurt is because of the high expectations we have set for others. Everyone is expecting the pastor to be perfect…how can he be…he is a mere man. He is also trying to work out his salvation. Everything we do, we should do it for God. Don’t look for recognition from men but look to God.
Wait for God’s direction
Maybe it is time for you to go to another congregation, but wait to hear from the Big Man, Himself, before making a move. It is easy for us to get up and leave when we are upset but wait for God.
You are not alone
I am grateful for the sisters and brothers that will express their hurts. While going through the pain it feels like you are alone. Like no one will understand what you are going through. But there are a lot of people that have faced this and can provide you with their testimonies as well.
Trust me, I have gone through so much with the church. Someone once told me I am resilient. Actually…I’ve been told that many times. As I was talking to someone the other day, I was thinking about all the things I’ve gone through, and I have to say, it is only by the grace of God that I haven’t left Him. I could never understand why I have gone through so much, but I do now. I have given you the very things I’ve used to help me to push through. I understand I’ve gone through the pain to help others. I pray these tips will help you.